Terminator 2

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HT12Book #2 is up for auction! You can see it HERE.

I had a hard time coming up with something for the number two. I even secretly snickered to myself as I dismissed some ideas out of hand.

2TThe problem with 2 is that it gets a bad wrap. Little humans of a certain somewhat unpleasant age are referred to as “The terrible twos.” Or in competition some view second place as “first loser,” and there’s no fun in that.

Then inspiration struck: I’m currently working on the sequel for Hazel Twigg & the Hollyhock Hideaway, the SECOND in the series right now! And you know what? Sometimes sequels outperform their originals! So, see? TWO can be a good thing!

2TSFor my yet-to-be-named sequel for Hazel Twigg, my goal is a release date of November of 2016. No more of this four year stuff! Plus, technically, I wrote two books in those four years. So really, writing a book in half that time shouldn’t be too hard.

Just like *most of the sequels represented here, I hope to make my second effort better than the first.

2ZaSo in this case, the number 2, or a sequel, as it were, means that there’s more experience under your belt. Sometimes you have a better feel of what people respond to, and you can improve upon that. Let us embrace the #2!

GUESS WHAT happened with book #3, my lucky number? My dear friend Jennifer Trenary purchased it for ME! She thought I should have it. Which makes me very lucky indeed – to have such friends as this. THANK YOU, Jennifer Trenary! You’re the best!

And with that, I leave you! Happy Blizzard! Happy Broncos! You’re my favorite!

*The original Ghostbusters was better than the sequel. It’s too early to tell with Zoolander 2. I have high hopes…

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Teeth For Tat

It wasn’t so long ago that I was innocently minding my business, filling out paperwork in the lobby of a bank in Humboldt, when I was politely informed that my driver’s license was expired – and had been for quite some time.


This is EXACTLY what Bank Fairies look like.

Apparently, there’s no “official” notice of this fact, the driver’s license fairies just expect you to somehow know! They expect you to look at this dreaded photo of DOOM, this unpleasant reminder in the least flattering light, that you are getting older. No way am I voluntarily looking at THAT.

Thank goodness for bank fairies!

There was a time when I didn’t mind looking at that tiny photo. The time way back when you could actually SMILE. With your TEETH.

I fondly recall the last time I went to the DMV, to get my last name changed from “Broccoli” back to my original name that I’d always been proud of. Back then my driver’s license photos had always been amongst my best.


This is the cop from Terminator 2. Not exactly a Cyborg, but he wasn’t human, just scary good.

I confidently stood in front of that blue screen and smiled my widest smile, determined to make this the best photo yet.

“We’re sorry, ma’am. You can’t show your teeth.”

First of all, “Ma’am”?! I’m a “Ma’am” now? I knew this day would come! Second of all, I couldn’t have heard correctly.

“Why?” I asked, dumbfounded.

Apparently, it’s for some sort of facial recognition thing. Now, unless all the local, friendly police officers have been secretly exchanged for Cyborgs, I have no idea why this should be necessary.

I was dismayed with no time to recover, and my picture that day surely reflected that. But now! Now! The time had finally come to rectify the situation.

I’ll show YOU a smile with no teeth!


Yep! I’m 29!
…And Look at my birth date: 1984. Coincidence? I THINK NOT.


Lastly, heaven help me if I ever get captured by Aliens that act like humans and parade me about in public and don’t let me speak.

“Finally! I’ve been saved!” I would cry upon my rescue, “WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?!!”

“I’m sorry, Ma’am.” (GAH!) “We were looking for a much smaller woman…”


“Do you weigh about the same as last time?” the pleasant clerk asked.

“Sure,” I replied.

Well, they won’t let me smile with my teeth, after all. I think we’re even now.